i've begun to input the newest edited deviantions. they have been edited just the way i wished they would, I hope you all enjoy them very much. I will hopefully be taking alot more soon. I just haven't gotten around to doing much because of work.

The rest of this is written in my madness, for my love of sarah smith and the way she was to me. I miss you very much and hope your well in Colorado.

on a better note I have come to notice that I do have one person left to remain close to here. She has been a great person to me, but also the most painful at the same time. I know her well enough to know what she wants. But i am going to remain cautious. I do miss my girlfriend very much, after she left all i wanted to do was die, even though she came back to see me during spring break I still wish she could remain here. Her father Is a great person and I love them both very much. I wish they had never moved but there is nothing i can do about it. I loved everything about her, her impulsiveness, her willingness, the way she could talk me into doing whatever was fun and whatever she wanted. she never judged me for my appearance, I don't understand why she thinks she is in love with me and her father always wanted me to be part of their family, I always felt at home with her. I was so comfortable around her. I could talk to her about what I thought and wanted and she would tell me whatever she felt or thought as well. I miss her so much. the way she would come see me at lunch when i was in schol sometimes. the last time i saw her before she moved we had a picnic during my lunch hour at school. sitting on the levy downtown and ate the chinese she made, I love her cooking, no one can cook anything as well as she can, or maybe its because of the way she always looked at me is why i liked her so much. Her eyes always felt entrancing. her skin was always warm and she was as tan as me, her hair so bright pink, all of her peircings gleaming, her smile so bright, her lips so red, eyes lined perfectly with black, her kiss so good to the taste. skin so smooth. I wish she would return.